What is Actually Behind the Words We Don't Say?
Updated: Mar 13, 2019
If we looked at all the places and spaces where words fill our voids and the meaning we create behind them, can you understand how messy they can get? Our words create our reality. Often times the depth our relationship with others is contingent on our ability to communicate. What happens when people don't say words that are actually real and true for them?
You hurt my feelings.
I'm mad at you for what you did 10 million years ago.
You broke my F'in heart you A'.
I don't feel like you're being honest with me.
I don't feel loved.
I don't feel cared for.
I don't feel appreciated.
And so on...
When people avoid these conversations, we numb our vulnerability. We numb it with what? Saying "I'm fine," which closes off the conversation and isolates you as well as the person who asked about your well being. Resentment. Anger. Passive aggressiveness. Withdrawal. The Silent Treatment. Judgement. Yelling. Name calling. Manipulation. Revenge. Excessive sleeping, overuse of TV, video gaming, food, drugs, alcohol, prescription abuse, (marijuana for those of you that are in denial and are defensive of your medical card!) We numb our workability on changing the situation and becoming a solution to creating something more joyous and more positive.
Today I want us to acknowledge our power on what it is we create in our relationships, and what we are reacting to, in any disharmonious situation that is showing up. It takes a strong person to look at hurt and acknowledge it. It takes a stronger one to open up to those that have hurt us or offended us in fear of not hearing what we want in return. People do not always have to tell us what we want to hear in return. We do not control them. I repeat, we cannot control them. We can only control ourself. This strength comes from us, and it creates who we are and who we are being. You're ability to be honest and vulnerable creates a completely different relationship with others than simply calling someone an A'hole and giving them the bird. ;) It will ultimately attract the juicy fulfilling relationships you long for.
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